There is a song on the radio right now, with a super-catchy beat, and when it came on the other day you clapped and danced along to it. I did too. But then I listened to the words, Dear Girl, and I cringed. I hate that our world will teach you that your beauty comes at the cost of another, you see.
This song, it’s meant to be empowering, I think. About being desirable as a girl with curves. Encouraging words for females like us (because we don’t share genetics, but child, you’ve got these feet and this bone structure.) But that power, it seems, if we’re to believe the words of this song, comes at the expense of mocking and sneering at those women who are unlike us. Setting us as better than them.
I want you to know, Child of my heart, that you are beautiful. You really are. Your strong legs, pushing your trike around the neighbourhood like a champ, are beautiful. Your long, dark eyelashes are stunning. Your smile is charming. Your curly coppery-brown hair is lovely. There will be times when you feel less than beautiful, simply because you are human. But know this – charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting and we only look youthful for a season. This beauty that I want you to know is that which isn’t actually all about you, and is based on your being an image-bearer of the One who created you. Created you in His very image. Knowing that, right there, will be what truly empowers you. There is shocking insight and power when you see yourself and others not as objects to be desired or scorned, but treasures to be cherished and admired.
You see, your shy friend with white-blonde hair, whisper light lashes and long, slim limbs? She is beautiful too. Your athletic friend with chocolaty-dark skin and sparkly eyes? Beautiful. Your grandmother, with years of experience and the grey hair as a crown of glory? Beautiful. All image-bearers.
So, Dear One, when I hear that song now, I don’t hear this catchy, danceable tune. I hear hurt, because my own beautiful friends are disempowered by my being empowered. I pray that you will have a sensitive heart to know when your sisters in this world are made less than, and help them see exactly who they are. Beautiful.
I love this. Thanks for sharing. It is true there are two common messages in our world :have a great body and use it or have a less than great body and hate the ones who have them. This needs to change. Thanks for the reminder that when we empower ourselves it is often at the expense of another.
You’re so welcome, Yvonne – and so right. And that’s just not the paradigm that I want my girl to grow up believing! Maybe things can change, one Mama at a time.